A week before Christmas I write this not as hasty material, but more so based on characteristics preserved by great truths of love, grace, and forgiveness. On this early morning, my words are not coincidental. They are not rushed. Instead their aim is to augment my expressions, feelings, and desires at this most precious time of the year. Thus, the two triads represented above, highlight the emotional and intellectual intensity I am exposed to in the presence of Christ Jesus. In the company of God! Deeper and deeper I bare my soul. It is a communion like no other.
Christian Wiman wrote so eloquently on awe-inspiring love as everyday love. The love of a mother to a child, friend to friend or husband to a wife. Wiman’s statement of overwhelming love resonated in me… “I’m talking more of other more durable relationships: it wants to be more than it is; it cries out inside to make it more than it is.” (p.23 Wiman, 2013). When I read this a few years ago, I couldn’t help but understand this to be the sort of love I feel for Our Father. I felt then that God provided this answer to me through the gifts of Wiman. I was pleased, I am pleased…
Durable love! The kind that offers prose so clear and simple when I apply concentration, honor, and praise. I ask questions directed to scholars for clarity to the complexity of the things I don’t know. Yet, I rely solely on God for answers. Resolutions may come immediately or could appear days, months or years from now. Hitherto, in my impatience, he is patient with me. Nestling comfortably in His words, is not his intention for my life. For instead, he wants his love to be expressed through me as doable words articulated from his durable relationship. When I scramble for contentment, his poetry and quintessence of love is always before me. This love of inimitable beauty, simplicity, and kindness. The love conveyed through the sweet baby boy born on Christmas day; who tightens my soul at every instance. He caresses all aspects of my being to make whole the identity of my spiritual aplomb. This sweet baby… this sort of love. My Christ Jesus! Whew! And, sniffle, sniffle… 🙂
4 So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. 5 He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. 6 While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, 7 and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.
Today I begin my countdown toward the re-birth of Christ within me. This birth removes all of the unimportance of this year, 2019. I dwell only in Him, and remove all of the unnecessariness, eager to dwell in me. The prickly knots in my soul vanish, and I create new stories within myself. Stories, I have yet to be told. None exhaustive they are, as they build on the beauty of this love within me. This, a passionate longing and pilgrimage I hold on to.
In preparation for the celebration of the birthday of Christ Jesus, I construct within me the commitment of releasing all that is not representative of Love. The experiences of the re-birth of unique beginnings await me. The Light of the great truths is before me. He was gifted frankincense, gold, and myrrh. Connecting to Him offers me so much more. As I observe the happenings of the world I inhabit, I must be a good porter of his truth. Truths that mirror his sort of amazing grace, forgiveness, and love. Father, I oblige.
Heavenly Father, your instructions are received. I accept fully your will for me. I hold on to your guide. I receive the Light of your son, Christ Jesus. He is the everlasting Light I hold in me. I reflect on His story of generous kindness and grace.
Your grateful daughter,
Source: Wiman, C. (2013). My bright abyss: Meditation of a modern believer. New York, NY: Faraus, Straus, and Giroux