13th November, 2019: 2 am (MST)
The decision to relinquish a client is always difficult for me. Honestly, I have found it to be quite daunting at times. But once it has been done, the freedom experienced is like calcium to my aging bones. I am no longer stifled in my creativity. My walk is noticeably youthful. I thank God for the wisdom received. And, I honor and praise Him.
These moments re-introduce to me the idea that more clients, more work, and more money, are just not who I am. I have no desire to be famous. I have no need to be well known. I am only interested in meaningful relationships. In my work I search for significance. With my clients I want fairness. Meaning, in the sense that the end goal must be the same. Fairness, that my invoices should be paid. I eventually receive my worth. I then move on with no looking back.
Holism is imperative in any area of life. When not apparent in my livelihood, I complete and don’t repeat. When not visible in my relationships, I work at it. Now… this is where I am truly the clay in our Potter’s hands (Isaiah 29:16). This reveal is one vital drive in my life. Everything I can’t give to clients who won’t place trust in the process, I bottle up to give to my relationships. Imagine what happens when a carbonated drink is shaken and released. This explosion! It’s like that. It’s exciting for me to work on issues of my own to please another. I adore this, specifically if the other is doing the same. Gosh and Wow! I flow so well in this gentle challenge…
Many years ago Michelangelo was asked how he could just chip at stone all day long. His response…
“The angel is already there. I just have to chip at the stone to release her.”
Yes, chipping at budding or ongoing relationships may be difficult in the beginning, but the beauty that comes from this art is magnificent and so worth it. This is my Something More.
It’s the More I consistently want in my life. Nothing else. It’s the More I prepare for. The More I take care of myself for. The More I own. And, the More I seek. It’s the More of You. It’s the More of me. Like the More, Our Father shows us as mercy (Luke 6:36). Hearts may resemble a pendulum in moments that are unknown. Back and forth, back and forth. Yet, balance can be ours, within His granular love. Balance allows us to know and enjoy stillness when we are willing to let all go and trust that God speaks even in the silence. We must be silent long enough to hear Him. He has asked us to love one another. His model of love is likewise the ultimate Something More.
“How precious is your unfailing love, O God!”-Psalm 36:7
More of you allows me to give more of me, Dear Father. You are such an awesome and amazing God. I honor you! I breathe in your sweet peace. Father, I am so thankful for You! Thank you for lessons and for the grace within them.
Your faithful and loving daughter,